Fertilizer Makes Things Grow: A Lesson from Job

This is a guest post. This is one of my favourite posts by my wife. Originally posted in 2011 by Melissa. Her take on some of the challenges we were going through at the time. Please read and enjoy. You can see her blog here

Why do you complain to him that he answers none of man’s words? For God does speak – now one way, now another – though man may not perceive it. -Job 33:13-14

[Apologies up front for the length…what started as a short summary of ideas gleaned from my current Bible study has turned into something akin to a PhD-worthy paper.]

I am not a gardener. I will never be a gardener. I joke about having a black thumb instead of a green one because, in my house, the ratio of plants that die to those that thrive is very, very large (or small…I don’t know which it is, statistics is not my thing). But even in my lack of expertise I know that if you want a plant to grow to it’s full potential it needs fertilizer. Something that brings much needed minerals and nutrients to those leafy greens and makes them leafier and greenier than they ever would become if left on their own. We see it all over – this is something I’m sure our farming ancestors figured out by observing nature. Which plants grew the most? The ones in the forest that were blanketed yearly with dead, decomposing leaves. Or the rich thicket of weeds that grew on dung heaps which had composted over time and become one with the soil.

Now how pleasant is fertilizer? Not very. How could it be? It is made out of manure – feces, excrement, crap (to be base) – or made out of dead and decomposing produce and/or foliage. Mmmmm, appetizing. NOT. It’s stinky and smelly and odorous, yet we put up with it because it produces a bigger, better, healthier version of whatever it is we are cultivating.

So…Why do we hate it so much when fertilizer when it is dumped on our life?

Huh? What? Yeah I hear the “what is she talking about” thought in your head. Let me explain…what do we spend most of our emotional energy on? All the annoyances we deal with day to day. The things in our lives that stink, frustrate, anger or tire us. All the “bad stuff” we would rather not deal with thank-you-very-much. Troubles come in many different sizes, shapes, textures and fragrances. It may be tangible to others, or maybe not. It could be related to many different things: health (physical, emotional, mental), relationships, finances, family, job or career…the list is endless. But why is it there? Are we being punished for something? Why do bad things happen in the world? Why do bad things happen to ME? [Warning: I’m about to tangent, but hang in there, there is a point, I promise!]

American humorist Erma Bombeck wrote a book entitled If Life Is A Bowl of Cherries What Am I Doing In The Pits? It’s a pretty funny book, and an appropriate analogy to how we feel a lot of times going through life. If life is supposed to be so wonderful, then why do I feel like I’m down here wading through all this garbage, the spat out remnants of something other people were able to savour and enjoy? [Well isn’t that funny…in order to get rid of the red squiggly you-spelled-it-wrong line under “savour” I had to switch my spell-check dictionary from English (United States) to English (Australia). I’m on the other side of the globe from Australia! Anything to keep the “u” in colour, flavour and favourite I guess. haha. But I digress…] My point is, most of the time the majority of us feel like we’ve ended up with the short end of the stick, having to deal with crap that we don’t deserve. In my opinion, the minority who sail through life claiming to be trouble-free are either delusional, extremely shallow conflict avoiders or are just flat out lying to themselves. Some of the crap in our life we will acknowledge as brought upon ourselves due to poor decisions or planning, but for the most part we think “what did I ever do to deserve this?”.

How on earth does this relate to Job??? The book of Job, from what I’ve gleaned, is all about looking at the big picture. Here was a man who had everything taken away from him: his kids were killed, his business was ruined, his health deteriorated quickly, he was shunned by family & friends & society, and his wife thought he was nuts! Murphy’s Law’s perfect storm.Everything went wrong. The biggest pile of manure ever was dumped on this man in the course of a couple days. (Job 1:13-2:10) Talk about holy crap!

But why did this happen? What on earth did Job do to deserve that?

As fish are caught in a cruel net, or birds are taken in a snare, so men are trapped by evil times that fall unexpectedly upon them. -Ecclesiastes 9:12

Just. Like. Job. So what do we do? How are we supposed to deal?

Yes, the crap that is dumped upon us, especially because of someone else’s foolish, malevolent actions, is heartbreaking. I would never ever, ever, wish it upon anyone. But the fact of the matter is crappy things happen. Three things in life are inevitable: death, taxes and crap. It’s unavoidable. And just like the first two things on that list, anyone who goes after, searches out and makes trouble for themselves is insane! In my opinion, anyway.

OK, back to Job… Here is a man who was blameless and upright in God’s eyes, who had the world’s largest pile of manure spread over his whole life. But why? First, God was trying to make a point to Satan, to prove that Job feared him [God] because God is God, and not because God had protected Job and made his life comfortable (Job 1:8-11). Second, and this is where my point comes in, I propose that God chose Job so that a) Job would grow in his understanding of God and b) he [Job] could be an example for others to learn from.

If Job was considered by God to be blameless and upright (Job1:8) I’m sure we can safely assume that he worshiped God with all his heart, that he was kind to others and treated them with respect, and that he was diligent in observing the Jewish Law (or whatever was required at the time; the dating of the book of Job is usually put at around the time of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, so before God gave his people the Law through Moses.) Either way, whatever Job was doing, he was doing right in God’s eyes, therefore we can assume that others would have considered him a “good” person. I’m sure Job was fairly confident that he knew and understood God.

Throughout the book, Job’s consistent plea is for God to explain to him what he did to deserve this punishment. He did not understand where these troubles were coming from because, as far as he knew, he went over and above in his devotion to God. At the end of his rant Job finally accuses God of being unjust. Yikes. God himself weighs in at this point and blasts Job assuming that he understood what makes God tick.

Job was humbled and repented. Because he changed and humbled his heart before God, God blessed him with more than he ever had before all this manure happened. (Job 42:12-17)

Do you think Job was excited to go through all that crap? Yeah, I doubt it. BUT, considering the results, did it improve his life in the long run? Yeah, it did. I think about plants in a garden and wonder, if they had conscious thought, would they be super fired-up to have a heap-load of manure dumped on them? It stinks! But in the end that fertilizer causes them to flourish to their full potential.

Remember those cherry pits Erma Bombeck wrote about? Well what do you think gives a cherry its foundation? That’s right – the PIT. A cherry cannot exist without a pit. So maybe pits, which we conventionally view as only good for composting (which, not so ironically, is used as fertilizer) aren’t all that bad after all. Starting to catch my drift?

We will always feel and need to deal with the manure that comes as the consequence of our own foolish decisions, but what about the manure dumped upon us because of someone else’s actions, or plain rotten luck? (See there? “Rotten” luck? What are rotten things good for again? More composting!) Maybe, just maybe, the crap we go through in our life has been allowed for a reason. God knows our full potential and he wants to help us reach it, and means reaching him. God may not restore our health, finances, worldly possessions, relationships or whatever it is we’ve lost, but when we change our perspective and look for the lesson to be learned and embrace it, our joy, peace, happiness and our ability to deal flourishes.

So…my point? After reading through what I’ve rambled on about, I’m realizing there are two parts: 1) Crap = manure = fertilizer = an opportunity to grow and reach our full potential, but 2) in order to make use of the fertilizer in our lives we need to get our eyes off the tree of today that we see from our worldly human perspective, humble ourselves and try to glimpse the forest of our life that God sees and take advantage of the opportunity to grow and draw closer to God.

No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. -Hebrews 12:11

Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death. -2 Corinthians 7:10 (7:8-11)

He is wooing you from the jaws of distress to a spacious place free from restrictions, to the comfort of your table laden with choice food. -Job 36:16

I know that there is nothing better for men than to be happy and do good while they live. That everyone may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all his toil – this is the gift of God. -Ecclesiastes 3:12-13

There is something else meaningless that occurs on earth: righteous men who get what the wicked deserve, and wicked men who get what the righteous deserve. This too, I say, is meaningless. So I commend the enjoyment of life, because nothing is better for a man under the sun than to eat and drink and be glad. Then joy will accompany him in his work all the days of the life God has given him under the sun. -Ecclesiastes 8:14-15

Love Always Trusts

This is a guest post. Originally posted in May 2011 by my wife, Melissa. Her thoughts are an excellent example of the great discussions we have. Please read and enjoy. You can see her blog here

Every couple weeks a group of us married women get together for fellowship, to encourage one another and to share what we are learning in our bible study & walk with God. We take turns planning the lesson and this past week it was mine. It occurred to me that in our particular group, I am the oldest (though not by much lol) and have also been married the longest, so I took upon myself the charge in Titus 2 for the older women to “urge the younger women to love their husbands and children”.

My husband and I have been through quite a cornucopia of challenges in the 12 years we’ve been married, from the typical “you left the lid off the toothpaste AGAIN” spats to serious relationship stressors such as (but not limited too) job loss, serious illness, major behavioural challenges with kids, failed business ventures & bankruptcy, and the loss of a child. So yeah, you can say we’ve been through the grinder. Surprisingly, each of these challenges, while bringing temporary and minor setbacks in our marriage, have only proven to strengthen our relationship not only with each other, but with God. I have pondered many times why we get through these tough times with renewed faith and peace of mind while other couples fall apart at the mere sight of the lid left 6 inches away from the toothpaste tube. The conclusion I came to is the aspect of love that is probably the hardest to commit to: trust.

1 Corinthians 13:7 has been on my mind lately:

It [love] always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

The concept of “love always trusts” has been at the forefront of these thoughts, especially as applied to parenting and to the calling we have as a wife. It’s been so in my face that I figured the Holy Spirit is trying to tell me something so I decided to dig in and see what the bible has to say on the subject. I started this study focused purely on what it means to trust God in my parenting and as a wife to my amazing husband. While digging, tangents, as these things do, cropped up, trying to lead me astray and turn a 10 minute devotional into a full-fledged 45 minute sermon. I managed to pare this blog back down to the original focus, but be warned that there is now much fodder for future blogs rolling around in my mind 😉

OK. Back to the focus… Love always trusts. We say we love God, but do we trust him, especially with our kids and in our roll as wives? What is trust anyways? From dictionary.com:

TRUST

noun

• reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence
• confident expectation of something; hope

verb

• to have trust or confidence in; rely or depend on
• to believe
• to expect confidently; hope

[As a side note, I was surprised at how closely this definition resembles Hebrews 11:1.]

It is all over Proverbs and Psalms that we are not to put our trust in other human beings (Psalm 118:8). Even those closest to us will disappoint and hurt us (Micah 7:5). But does that mean we shut down or shut others out and keep away from everybody? Most definitely not. There is a difference between trusting someone and trusting IN someone. The only one we should trust IN is God. We are called to love one another as Jesus has loved us (John 13:34). Since love always trusts, we are called to trust one another as Jesus has trusted us. In my opinion (obviously, as this is my blog) what he trusts about us is our desires to obey God and to do what is right. He knows that we will bumble along, fall and fail, but he trusts that we will get up and keep trying. This is the same trust that we need to have with each other. But more importantly, Jesus trusts that God is in complete control. You know what’s cool? God will always be there for us when we trust him.

For in Scripture it says; “See I lay a stone in Zion, a chosen and precious cornerstone, and the one who trusts in him will never be put to shame.” –1 Peter 2:6

The quote in that verse is from Isaiah 28:16

So this is what the Sovereign LORD says: “See, I lay a stone in Zion, a tested stone, a precious cornerstone for a sure foundation; the one who relies on it will never be stricken with panic.”

Have you ever been stricken with panic? I have, especially when something happens to my kids. Last summer my then 4 year old daughter was bugging me to go on a bike ride. I was busy working and kept putting off her request again and again. About an hour after her last plea I realized the house was too quiet. Yep, you guessed it. Being the independent, self-confident and very social little lady that she is, she took matters into her own hands and went for a bike ride on her own. PANIC!!! It really was a fight not to panic, as I enlisted my then 8 year old son to get on his bike and search the paths for his sister while I got in the car and drove around the neighbourhood. Did she go down to the lake and fall in? Did she get hit by a car while disobediently crossing a street? Did she fall and hurt herself? Did someone snatch her?

After about 15 minutes I found her a couple blocks from our house, merrily riding down the sidewalk waving and saying hi to everyone she passed by. She was on her way home after going to a small playground by our house. She had kept to the paths and not crossed a road and was coming home in time for dinner. We are very blessed to live in a neighbourhood that has a near zero crime rate so even logically I had no reason to be afraid. But you never know. And that’s exactly where that sneaky Devil will attack in your mind. In our society anxiety is a well-used weapon in his arsenal because it attacks our love’s weakest link: trust.

You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you. –Isaiah 26:3

If trust brings peace then a lack of trust breeds anxiety. When we are anxious about something is it not because we are relying on ourselves or someone else rather than trusting in God? Especially with our kids. We want to protect them, which is part of love, but how much protection is too much? How much bubble wrap is too much? Do we really trust God where our kids are concerned? Yes, we need to be shrewd when it comes to what we will permit them to do and what we won’t, but how much bubble wrap do we use before we suffocate them? Are we teaching them to deal with life and how to get up after falling or are we trying to protect them from ever falling in the first place?

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. –Proverbs 3:5-6

[Just an FYI…this is my all-time favourite scripture; it’s pretty much the theme for my life so it will pop up in almost everything I write.]

There is a footnote at the end of verse 6 that states an alternate translation:“in all your ways submit to him, and he will direct your paths”. I think this version is a more accurate description of the path God has laid out for each of us as it will never be straight as an arrow. On straight paths you can see what’s coming and that is NOT what happens in real life. Our path to God is often like a trail of switchbacks up a mountain. It’s hard work and you are never really sure what lies ahead, be it a mini rock slide to navigate or a rest area with an amazing view. We never know what’s on the other side of the next switch but we persevere and trust that God will take us where he wants us to go, and that at the end of the trail, at the top of the mountain, is an eternal reward.

We each have our own path. Being married, our path is like a cross country ski path, a pair of grooves side by side, my husband and I, two skis attached to a single body. Our kids are on their own path. We can tie them to us keeping them safe and close, and we need to when they are small, but if we keep them there when they are older how are they going to find their own way? Our kids need to find their own path. Are we teaching them to navigate it for themselves, to trust in God themselves, or are we holding tight and trying to force them along the path God has ordained for ourselves? As they grow up we need to trust our kids in the way that Jesus trusts us, trust in their desire to follow God of their own volition. But so much more than that we need to trust that God loves them MORE than we do and is going to do as much to keep them on their correct path as he does to keep us on ours. If love always trusts, how true is our love for God if we don’t trust him with our kids?

There are some things in this life that we are powerless to stop. Job is a perfect example of this. He was successful in business and family and he was “blameless and upright; he feared God and shunned evil”. (Job 1:1) In his dealings with people he would have been honest yet shred, making righteous decisions that did not wilfully put his family in harm’s way. He raised his kids to adulthood, which back then was a feat in itself, and taught them to respect and fear God. And once they were adults and had families of their own, he would present sacrifices to God on their behalf, just in case (Job 1:5), trying to keep that bubble-wrap around them spiritually. But they were killed anyways. There are some things that we can’t prevent, no matter how much we prepare and protects. But this is exactly why we need to trust in God.

As God-fearing women there is one other area of our lives where trust is pushed to the limit; in our role as a wife.

Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Ephesians 5:24

Submission. At the mere mention of this word most women raise their guard, stick their fingers in their ears and sing “la la la la la I can’t hear you la la la la la” lol. I know. I’ve been there. I’ve tried every argument possible to justify circumventing this command. I’ve tried living in my marriage as if that word didn’t exist and you know what? It kinda sucked, unless you thrive on arguments and strife and don’t mind living with an overall air of unease and anxiety. Keep reading with an open mind and you may be surprised at the brilliance of God’s plan.

Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewellery or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear. –1 Peter 3:3-6

What is right is to submit ourselves, our will, our lives to our husband, just like the church is to submit to Christ. I really think this is what Peter was talking about when he called us the weaker partner (1 Peter 3:7); not only do we need to submit everything we are and have to Jesus as our lord, we need to do the same with our husbands. On the surface it does suck and seem unfair (and I could go on and on but that would be digressing) because we in no way have decision-making power like the guys do, unless they give it to us. How on earth can God expect us to submit to this guy who routinely makes decisions we might not understand or agree with? By trusting in HIM, not our husbands. They are human and will make mistakes. [Right now this computer is acting like a real bugger and is frustrating me to no end, which leads me to believe that I’m on the right track and someone *coughSatancough* is trying to discourage the posting of this.]

Anyways…where was I? Right. Obeying our husbands. How does God expect us to show love to Him? By obeying his commands.

In fact this is love for God: to keep his commands. –1 John 5:3a

It just so happens that one of his commands is for wives to submit to their husbands and to respect them. But why don’t we want to? Because it scares the crap out of us to relinquish control of our lives to someone else. But can we really say we love God and follow Jesus if we can’t even lay down our lives for our husbands?

And this is love: that you walk in obedience to his commands. As you have heard from the beginning, his command is that you walk in love. –2 John 1:6

We show God we love him by living a life that is obedient to his commands, and the summary of those commands is to live a life that always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. That is why at the end of 1 Peter 3:6 he exhorts us to not give way to fear but to trust in God. If we keep our eyes focused on God, and in our marriages strive to always protect our husbands, always trust that regardless what happens God will fight for our salvation, always hope for the reward of heaven and always persevere in these things, then we will be at peace. We may not understand or agree with the decisions our husbands make or the things they ask us to do, but we can most certainly trust that God will protect our soul and spirit.

The LORD will fight for you; you only need to be still. –Exodus 14:14

Be still and know that I am God. –Psalm 46:10

In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name. –Psalm 33:21

You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you. –Isaiah 26:13

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. –Romans 15:13

Remember that unfading beauty of a quite and gentle spirit from 1 Peter 3:4? That is our strength.

This is what the Sovereign LORD, the Holy One of Israel, says: “In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength” –Isaiah 30:15

That passage carries on to say that we “would have none of it”, which sounds just like most women today. For some reason we fight so hard to have the very thing that causes us distress instead of giving ourselves over to God, trusting him and resting in his peace. Like Paul says in 2 Corinthians 12:9, God’s power is made perfect in our weakness.

Want a peaceful, joyful life? It’s very, very simple.

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. –Proverbs 3:5-6